Uni? Completed it mate.

I had my last ever exam just over a week ago. I thought I would feel relief, I thought I would have this wild change, (like when Princess Fiona changed from a human to an ogre in the church with Lord Farquard, levitating into the air and shit), of moving from a student to an adult. In all honesty, it was a bit of an anticlimax and my only true feelings are those of sheer panic, fear and anxiety.

For the past 20 years or so, life has been education and this education has been totally mapped out for me. Nursery, primary school, secondary school, 6th form, uni… Now what? Before getting to this point I was so excited about this unknown. The thought of having full agency and control over what I do now seemed like a super exciting prospect, but now it’s here, I’m not so sure.

I have so many ideas, so many shells of plans, so many things I want to do. I want to start a career, but I also want to relax. I want to travel, but I also want to start saving. I want to work abroad, but I also want to spend time with my friends and family here: everything idea I have seems to conflict with another. I even toyed with the idea of doing a masters to keep myself in the safe and warm bubble of education just for a little while longer.

I guess everyone feels the same after finishing uni, unless you’re one of those people that have their shit together and got onto a gRaD sChEmE. For now, at least, I know that I want to have a summer – and have an amazing one at that. By about September/October time I want to have a big girl job in London. By January I want to have my year planned out. (It will be interesting to read this post back and see if this plan actually went to plan).

To conclude, I have absolutely no idea what the fuck I’m doing.